His/Her/Its tory

突然 我驚覺
當落下字的瞬間
我書寫的不只是心情
是我存在的時地的歷史
不管用怎樣的方式呈現



是我揣摩揣測
用第一第二第三或不存在人稱
說著

有個人

有個人我會知道 很放心 安心
當難過陷入最深沉的時候
我會想躲在他身邊
他是安靜的 體諒的
他的手很大 張開 可以擋著強風
他的心很細 不用包容
我的眼淚 情緒 靜默 對他而言再平凡不過
他不驚恐 不慌張
讓我覺得自己是不特別又特別的那個

不再

想你的時候 竟隨著接收到的資訊 越來越少了
很久很久 我不會再想你 連我最愛的你的聲音都微弱著
但窮極難過時 我會把那些跟你一樣角色的人 翻箱倒櫃的一頁頁複習著
不會太久 我就找到你 畢竟我愛人的能力與被愛的機會是貧乏的
可我卻怎麼樣都找不到那個可以像你一樣聽到我的難過
就把太陽送到我身旁 溫暖的 沒有壓力的
然後我哭著笑了

Dear R,
你會是個祕密,在無數個回憶裡,在電影院我身旁的位置裡,我們親密的靠著,身邊是各自的對方
我們沒有牽著他/她,我們沒有認著彼此,我們在各自的抽屜裡,不出聲的躺著,就像不曾來過一樣
我們不曾談愛,但有一刻我們知道自己是屬於彼此的,我們沒有約束,但每個夜晚那個時間是空著等待的,我們沒有破壞,沒有隱形的線。如果我們再相遇,我們會像巴辣劇中一樣失憶,也許我們會再度想念彼此,但不是現在,也不是以後,是在未來的某一天,一個微微陽光的冬天午後,我們把鎖打開,然後那段日子,也跟著蒸發了

慈悲

不要再冷血傷人後
才自以為慈悲的輕撫傷口

收起你那自以為是的濫情
別望過去

欣賞

我欣賞她的書寫能力
那是我很清楚再如何用力
如何悲著 如何折磨自己也無法有的表情
因為我沒有她那樣的靈魂

Happy Valentine's Day for eight

I saw a flower shop on the way to Tesco express,
The words on the board which in front the shop are said "stop for flower, for valentine's".
We don't celebrate this day. For me it doesn't mean anything.
Tomorrow is our day for eight. For me it means nothing as well.
But one song comes to my mind, it's our song which reminds me to cherish everything of us all the time even I often feel hopeless.


If I Ain't Got You --Alicia Keys

Some people live for the fortune
Some people live just for the fame
Some people live for the power, yeah
Some people live just to play the game
Some people think that the physical things
Define what’s within
And I’ve been there before
But that life’s a bore
So full of the superficial

Some people want it all
But I don’t want nothing at all
If it ain't you baby
If I ain’t got you baby
Some people want diamond rings
Some just want everything
But everything means nothing
If I ain’t got you, Yeah

Some people search for a fountain
The promise is forever young
Some people need three dozen roses
And that’s the only way to prove you love 'em
Hand me the world on a silver platter
And what good would it be
no one to share
no one who truly cares for me

Some people want it all
But I don’t want nothing at all
If it aint you baby
If I ain’t got you baby
Some people want diamond rings
Some just want everything
But everything means nothing
If I ain’t got you, you, you
Some people want it all
but I don't want nothing at all
If it ain't you baby
If I ain’t got you baby
Some people want diamond rings
Some just want everything
But everything means nothing
If I ain’t got you, yeah

If I aint got you with me baby

oh so nothing in this whole
wide world dont mean a thing

If I aint got you with me baby

look on the bright side

不管再用力 再用心
都是徒勞

當你只看著你看到的那一面時
因為我們都吝嗇珍惜